It's good to be here . . . .good to be ALIVE!!

Coming from a generation of folks who hoped we died before we got old, but somehow didn't manage to make the cut, I do have to say that I feel fortunate to have stuck around long enough to witness the current BDSM community in all it's glory.

I often get inspiration from my fellow denizens of the art of electronic communication.  To be honest, there are far more outstanding BDSM blogs and bloggers than I can follow on a regular basis.  That's what one former boss called a "high level problem" - meaning it's a good problem to have.  Better to have more than you know what to do with, than not enough.

It seems there was once a time where it was exceedingly rare to encounter literate individuals living a BDSM lifestyle.  With the profusion of sex bloggers these days, that's not necessarily as true, as the diversity of the BDSM community truly seems to be unparalleled.

It's a very good time to be alive . . .

Serafina adds:

It is a very good time to be alive!!  Yes we could dwell in the mud of long ago and get mired down so much that it could paralyze.  But life is what we choose to make of it.  Although we are surrounded by negative and shocking news, and bombarded by disasters on many levels, we still can choose, and choose we will.

People die, get sick, injured, or suddenly tire of loving.  We sometimes pay a huge price for what other people do.  Sometimes you can do more by "doing" nothing. 

We never watch news anymore.  We might glimpse the most prominent headline from the paper but seldom read the details.  Or we hear the sizzling quips from a newscast that happens to be next after watching Dr OZ because we forgot to turn it off. 

It's not that we are blissfully un-aware of what is going on, but we don't care to know all the speculation and opinion.  We want to focus on what matters most.  Our relationship.  We desire to live without regrets, simply, uncluttered, unfettered.(however we are into Bondage!)  Our goals are not to amass fortunes, and kingdoms, but to live a simple life, indulging in pleasuring our spirit soul and body as long as possible.  In acceptance and tolerance we aspire to live in harmony and find balance.

Rodney Erickson's morally bankrupt & Joe Paterno's criminal . . .

Sexual abuse of children is one area where I see absolute black and white. As readers will see at the end of the post, there's a reason the topic is personal for me. I'm biased, I admit it. There's no journalistic balance in my viewpoint, not even a pretense.

Fuck with a 12 year old child and I personally would like to see every one of your constitutional rights dismissed. It's the one place in life where I believe true torture is warranted. There a special place in Hell reserved for people who sexually abuse children, and I'm not above wanting that awful fate to start here on this mortal coil . . .

It grieves me very much when I hear people say 'the Penn State scandal.' This is not Penn State. This is 'the Sandusky scandal.  We're not going to let what one individual did destroy the reputation of this university.
    -- Penn State University President Rodney Erickson

The Associated Press story I've just quoted, begins with the following lede:

Penn State University's president told alumni that the school's crisis can be blamed on one person: former football assistant coach Jerry Sandusky. But many alumni are still grieving over the firing of longtime football coach Joe Paterno.

Joe Paterno - responsible for Sandusky's crimes?

Up until today, I've deliberately avoided comment on the ongoing scandal at Penn State University, where the school, it's athletic department, and it's football coaches, all actively ignored an ongoing pattern of predatory sexual abuse of young men by former football assistant coach Jerry Sandusky.

It disgusts me that anyone dares to defend Paterno, a man who may very well have been an outstanding teacher of football skills, but also an individual who must be found totally wanting and undeserving of the title great coach.  Paterno failed in the greatest responsibility a coach has to his team, he failed to put the team first!

Joe put his own desire to break records ahead of the well being of his athletes.  When Paterno decided to look the other way and effectively condone vile sexual abuse of minors by coach Sandusky, personal violations that happened in the very locker rooms Paterno should have been policing, he became complicit in the crimes themselves.

Most anyone with the slightest shred of common sense realizes that loyalty to friends, and even to authorities who control our lives, must have limits.  The individuals who hung after the Nuremburg Trials demonstrate the ultimate fate of those who follow blindly . . . 

So, why do former star athletes like Franco Harris fail to understand that by looking the other way and failing to disclose a rapist among his cadre of personally picked coaching staff, that Paterno himself committed a crime?

I understand loyalty to a coach, the role of coach and dominant have much in common, and I certainly expect loyalty from any submissive who might wear my collar.  But there are limits to loyalty, and those limits must break whenever a child's welfare is at stake.

If a child is raped in my house, and I fail to disclose it to the proper authorities, for whatever reason, I have become an accessory to the crime.  A child was raped in Joe Paterno's "house" and he did not the slightest thing to bring the criminal, his friend and fellow coach, to justice.  Morally, and perhaps legally, he's an accessory to the crime.

Remember former President Nixon and Watergate?  Most of the individuals who were jailed for crimes relating to the break-in at the Watergate Hotel were not convicted for the actual crime.  Instead they were sent to prison for their role in the cover up.

I'd like to see Joe Paterno jailed for failing to disclose the rape of a young child in his locker room.  I'd like to see everyone who was complicit in those crimes by refusing to report them to the proper authorities, brought up on criminal charges.

It's simple really, whether you are a coach or a dominant.  Along with authority comes responsibility.

I too was victimized in my youth by a predatory man, a teacher, a supposed authority.  I too had individuals who should have known better, who should have protected me as an innocent child, look the other way.  I know what it's like to have abuse whisked under the rug, and it's ugly.  It's really ugly . . . 

Serafina is reminded of Pontius Pilate, a man who washed his hands and sealed another's fate.  Me? I believe there's a low circle in Hell reserved for individuals who prey on the sexual innocence of youth.  It's only shared with one other group, just as vile - their accomplices and apologizers.

See you in Hell Joe!

VOTE - ohhh darlings how will Serafina's poor butt burn?

hack ¹  (hk)

v. hacked, hack·ing, hacks

v.tr.

a. Informal To alter (a computer program): hacked her text editor to read HTML.

b. To gain access to (a computer file or network) illegally or without authorization: hacked the firm's personnel database.

2. Informal

a. To write or refine computer programs skillfully.

b. To use one's skill in computer programming to gain illegal or unauthorized access to a file or network: hacked into the company's intranet.

The Scorpion's 9 thin neoprene tresses cause extreme "sensation" 
Photo by Gillian of Adam and Gillian

I'd like to start this post with an apology for anyone who might have gotten any odd mail, or warnings, from Tumblr or Serafina's email, perhaps even this site.  Apparently Serafina was hacked by an individual who uses malicious code in a Tumblr page to elicit users to enter their email address and password.

Serafina's very sorry this has happened!

To the best of our knowledge Google, Facebook, and other services shut the intrusion down and warned her immediately.  All of her accounts have been secured and are now again under her complete (and almost exclusive - Master knows her passwords ) use and control.

When Serafina feels as though she has let me down, she's quite self punishing.  I almost always reserve corporal punishment (CP) like spanking and paddling for exclusive use in a scene between she and I; meaning in our household CP is not used in a punitive fashion for mistakes or misbehavior.

I don't believe in spanking children for misbehavior either, by the way, it's an odd quirk of mine I guess.  I believe in more inventive forms of discipline, where somehow the punishment fits the crime.  I look to make discipline reinforce the lesson I'm about to teach.

However, I'm thinking a bit of corporal discipline is in order, simply to help reinforce in her mind that one must exercise extraordinary caution when navigating the Internet.  I think this needs to be a lesson she remembers . . .

Since her mistake involved the readers of this blog, I thought it was only fitting for the blog's reader's to help decide her fate!  There's a poll on the top right of our sidebar where reader's will get to decide what kind of punishment Serafina receives.

1. Long horsehair flogging.  Horsehair can be very sensuous, in the beginning.  The longer and harder the horsehair flogger is used, the more it tends to make skin itch, then burn.  I've heard it described as leaving a submissive teetering between begging for it to stop, and begging for more.
2. Her first real caning.  I have three new canes on the way from a wonderful couple who produce outstanding toys.  They will arrive before the poll concludes.
3. All of Master's paddles! I have two new paddles on the way from the same source as the canes, adding more variety to the already extensive collection of paddles and slappers this punishment would deliver to Serafina's backside.
4. 10 lashes from "the Scorpion" - The Scorpion is pictured at the start of this post.  Here's how the Cat is described by it's maker:  Scorpion - Severe -9 tresses, 26” long - Eight thin, round tresses surround the one longer center tress -- which gives this sting-y Black Rubber Cat its name. This “stinger” tress creates a second point of contact at each stroke, which, as often as not, is a “wrap” -- a stroke that wraps around the body in a “crack the whip” fashion, increasing the power of the impact. With the idea that owners will trim the center tress to suit their own styles, we put a bit more length in this tress than, strictly speaking, may be called for.  For the record, I've never gotten around to trimming that center tress, oooops my bad!
5. Everything Master can offer. - This is probably the most intense option, although none of the individual elements (cane, paddle, strap, flogger, etc) would be used for long, the sheer number of different floggers, crops, paddles, straps would ensure a long and exhausting scene for everyone involved.  For instance she'd likely feel the full sting of the scorpion a couple times before moving to another alternative.
6. Nothing - poor girl suffers enough. - If this option is picked, I'd honor it of course, but where's the fun in choosing this option?

It's simple really, Serafina and I get our individual votes, but beyond that her fate is in the hands of our readers.  Her vote was the first, and she had the single stipulation that she was not allowed to select #6, but from here until the poll closes next Saturday at Midnight CST, she can only await the fate that you, our dear readers, will inflict as her punishment.

You know what they say in Chicago - "Vote Early and Vote Often!"

so I tapped my ruby red shoes . . .

un·a·mused/ˌənəˈmyo͞ozd/

Adjective:

Not responding in a positive way to something intended to be amusing; feeling somewhat annoyed or disapproving.

Apparently, because of my "magnetic personality" I set off metal detectors.

It's usually a minor inconvenience.  Going in and out of Courthouses and Federal Buildings entails going through metal detectors. I set them off.  I'm used to it.  There the only "penalty" for setting off metal detectors in those venues is a scan with annoying hand metal detectors that occasionally screech or squeal.

This last week was different though.  I just returned from a business trip that took me out of town for a few days.  I flew to the East Coast.  In airports, it means I'm going to get inspected, detected, anything but neglected!

Not only did I undergo the ignominy of the Transportation Security Administration (TSA) body scans, but I got the privilege of being "patted down" in three different international airports within the last week.  Then the gloves used to pat me down are tested to assure my clothes don't have some kind of special residue.

TSA should instead stand for "Tantric Sadists of America" - Don't ya think?

At one station, as I was putting my shoes back on, a helpful TSA employee brought over a container with a few cents of change I'd "forgotten" to pick up.

"You forgot your change, Sir!"  I was told.

"Keep it as a tip," I responded.

 Deadpan voice, unamused, says; "We're not allowed to accept tips, Sir."

"Anyone who feels me up that nice deserves a tip don't you think?"

No response, blank stare.

"Well for God's sake man," I said earnestly, "If I forgot the change in my pocket, and my wife washed the pants, next time you might accuse me of laundering money!"

He wasn't impressed.

Neither was I.

I couldn't help but wishing I was in "Oz."  Despite the wicked witches of certain cardinal points on the compass, I don't remember poor Dorothy getting felt up!

There's no place like home . . .
There's no place like home . . .
There's no place like home . . .

Wanted . . .a Dom. . . a master. . .

Looking for Love

Ever notice the number of people who need and want to be dominated? There seems to be a disproportionate ratio of people. . mostly women.  . . who are out there looking for someone to serve.  I hate to disappoint most of them because the good ones are always in demand and thereby taken.

Oh there are a good number of guys who do call themselves a "Dom", but may not have a clue what it takes to really be a Dominant.  Very few excel by it naturally  without having studied and researched the topic.  Many people seem to think that relationships, no matter of what nature they are will just fall into place without any care or concern and somehow there will be eternal bliss.

Won't happen!  Nadda!  All relationships take work. . .communication and understanding.

 More than anything,- Acceptance is key  

If one enters into a relationship at first everything seems so exciting and exhilarating, and it is,  You have no real expectation from each other and for most part you are willing to overlook things that may become a serious irritant in the not so distant future.  This can be either a very real warning sign or  a serious flaw; but you'd be seriously wrong if you think (as a submissive) he can be changed!  If as a Dom you think you have the right to correct you are also extremely wrong! 

Let me explain. . .As a Submissive you are on a journey, a destiny. . not to work at becoming a sub, but at being the best person you can be and to live that destiny.  With or without that Dominant, because when you are not looking for one, he/she will appear and you need to be ready. And as a Dominant you need to cultivate how to be tender and tough at the same time.  Not easy by any stretch and so many fail at this task.  

There are very few people who can sustain a lot of humiliation, extreme pain, and verbal abuse for an extended period of time.  If they appear to, they may well be physiologically flawed and need help.   You as a Dominant may even think that you are equipped for the task and you may very well be, but consider the long-term consequences that you may never develop trust or closeness as a patient/doctor living together.  Many live in a fantasy, magical, make-believe world and never give mind to how to create a space in which fantasy and illusions can be given a safe conception and delivery. How many readers could lend credence by admitting that they existed in a dead-end relationship for years trying to keep making it work out?

Thinking that one can "change" behaviors is presumptuous and full of folly.  No one can change unless he/she decides to of their own accord.  Even making the decision to change yourself is entirely fraught with obstacles as any smoker would know very well having tried umpteen times to quit. Change is a personal journey that begins and ends with "I care . . .  so I will"  

You can't make me. . .won't work unless I want to. . . and I would have to be convinced that I was loved and cared for in a way that I can recognize to trust you to help me. . what ever form that might take.  All that trust and confidence arises from discussion and over time the trust begins to grow.  Love, confidence, and trust are like mushrooms and keep spawning and propagating if cultivated well.  Left unattended, however and you could have a slimy mess.  

Everything is about giving and Everything is about receiving

I can not give anything unless there is someone to receive.  That is I as a submissive must be in a position to be able to receive and take into possession what my Dominant is offering.  It may be something I need, desire, or am willing to experiment  but unless I receive it  may be imposed, but it may not be the expected out-come.  And unless there is communication there are doubts which can lead to a downward spiral.

The goal we have at the Samadhi Castle is a highly positively charged energetic relationship with understanding of dynamics that keep it romantically out of control and enjoyable to the very end of our lives.  As a Master, Michael Samadhi has self-taught, and availed himself to almost everything written about sexual deviance and relationships, Tantra, spiritualism, and many other topics as they relate.  Serafina has done much the same.  We strive to serve the other. each in our unique ways.  Sometimes it means giving up on an agenda one of us has in honor for the other.  That can sometimes be difficult, but the end result is more fabulous still, because in an environment like that trusting becomes more simple, because nothing is reserved.  Places like Kink Academy has endless resources to learn techniques from getting consent to rope tying and anything your devious mind can imagine, and perhaps more.  There are lists of books too, - a few of which are listed here.

This Curious Human Phenomenon: An Exploration of Some Uncommonly Explored Aspects of BDSM--Peter Masters

        Master/slave Relations: Communications 401 (M/s Series)--Robert Rubel PhD 

Master/slave Relations: Solutions 402, Living in Harmony--Robert Rubel PhD 

Protocols: A Variety of Views: Power Exchange Books' Resource Series--Robert Rubel PhD 

The Control Book--Peter Masters

Homework!

Temporary play space

Master and I have been working to renovate a house into our home.  We first moved in and amalgamated as much of our 3 bdrm house we had into Master's mom's house.  We had to sell our first home.  We spent all our time being caregivers until she passed late August of 2011.

The house had not been upgraded for many years, and there were many unpleasant memories associated with it.  The advantage is the house is entirely paid for, so all we have to do is pay taxes and utilities.  so we set about to redecorate most of the interior and the redecorating involves making every room to suit our needs.

We are childless and pretty much keep to ourselves so we make the rules and break conventional ones. . .like turning the "living-room" into a bedroom! and a Bedroom into a TV/media room. . with a play space!

Unfortunately the kitchen will still function as a kitchen/ eating area.  but we are painting everything from the ceiling to the floor.  The walls and ceiling are done, and I have been working on the cabinetry, for which we 1. purchased a kit.
 first step is taking off doors. . easy
second step is removing all hardware. . tedious
third step is scarping all build up dirt and removing what is visible. . disgusting!
forth step is "de-glossing"  a further very intense step I spent the most time and effort upon.

Because I was paying a LOT of attention to details, it was very intense.  It felt very spiritual, to tell the truth- it was spiritual.  I am super sensitive to cosmic energy and I felt clearly like paying this close attention to every tiny edge and crack and decorative piece, and removing every trace of the past I was establishing a new beginning.  Gone are the bad memories, and negative experiences.  Out they go into the trash.  No one should suffer any of those! Removed!

I am not done yet, I have a good way to go.  But, we are moving forward now with love and determination, and fresh new journey of our own, and we will be very careful to not allow any bad things to happen in our home.

Our home is a place of peace.  And surrender. And Play!

My Journey

who am I? I wish I knew that in a way that mere words would suffice to tell adequately.

 I have and still am discovering more and more each day. . . that everything I once thought I knew might not be as I'd perceived. 

Reality is born into and dies in each individual mind. . .and every one's perception of reality is only in their mind, even if that person adheres to anther's reality - supposing that he has inherited it by will and choice.

Some people refuse to make their own choices and are never able to become responsible to themselves, and those masses adhere religiously and tenaciously to very entrenched concepts, which become the boundaries of existence, and their need for security is so great that they dare not question boundaries that exist only in their mind, of course, because if indeed they are moved, it upsets their entire paradigm.

Testing boundaries however has lead me on a very fascinating journey.  Some parts of this journey can be extraordinarily difficult and confusing.  I earnestly seek to avoid those parts, wanting to embrace only the enjoyable and wonderful experiences. 

But unless the wonderful is tested,  . . then it is a rental agreement, rather than the ownership contract.  And so I am compelled to stretch the borders of understanding.  The amazing thing is how much more there is than what what I think - than  all the stuff I know.

So much more!  Sometimes The Creator closes a door but then there is an open window. . . maybe a new opportunity, . . and hopefully healing and solace. Michael is my tower of strength. I am deeply committed to him, Thank-you Michael.

I am the author of many photos here at Spiritual BDSM.  I have long been a rather casual, free-lance Photographer. In High School I had the privilege of playing in a black and white darkroom, and was known as the school photo techie.  I enjoyed every aspect from winding cartridges to reload them from bulk film to processing to the most fun part of printing and manual manipulation.

My work was printed in the annual yearbooks and local weeklies and whenever I cared to enter some teen mags I quite often placed.   But, because I married early   to escape a bitter living situation from my parent's home and settled into fulfilling domestic lifestyle that was not conducive to continue or to promote further adventures in photo arts for over 20 years.

I met a lady who became a close friend and mentor and encouraged me to re-open the creative doors that had been closed tight for so long and I joined the Abbotsford Photo Arts Association for 6 years until my friend moved to the Island. 

Because of lack of stimulus and life getting in the way  . . it got pushed aside again.  I didn't lose interest. . .I lost momentum. . .and by the time I returned now. . .the darkrooms had all but vanished and digital was still in early and somewhat unpredictable form. . . so I continued to dabble here and there

While with the APAA we had bi monthly competitions and I frequently earn a coveted place and we also had a number of member arranged excursions and invited "famous" professionals who would share their skills. Even with the encouragement of one of those telling me  that I had exceptional eye, I never acquired the where-with-all to procure professional level equipment, so my goal was to use the equipment I do have to the fullest potential. 

I have had a number of opportunities to use my skills for several conventional weddings and once I was invited to photograph a very Traditional First Nations wedding ceremony, with the attendees in full traditional regalia.

Today I continue to capture and and strive to personally be the best I can become.  I guess in the end that's all we can be.  As an artist, photography is a medium and tool, among canvas, paint, and brushes.  With those tools I try and capture something that inspires and motivates others to find beauty and form in the ashes of life.

The camera is a Cool-pix pro 80 we picked up as an interim camera in lieu of the D-300 or maybe??? we are not quite decided, but we have Nikon 135mm bodies and lenses that we are trying to go digital with.  This little camera has done so well that we are wondering if there is any rush at all. After a lot of thought we did purchase a Nikon7000.  It will now be our primary piece of equipment.

I should also probably mention that Master and I are almost always together so we combine our efforts. . .sometimes I see the shot and he takes it. . especially ones like this, because I have a tremor in my hands and even vibration reduction can not always make up for that.

Even if Master and I met originally in an unusual way, it has and is the best thing that ever happened to me.  I have had this adventure now for close to 8 years, and since then Master has shown me that I am truly a submissive,   I am bound to him as a love-slave, and although we may not be perfect, we do live as much as possible 24/7.